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This is why the current moment has both women and men reassessing interactions from their past, wondering if they were on either end of a troubling encounter.
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Though the lines between acceptable behavior and harassment feel in some ways clearer today than ever, there still isn’t anything close to broad agreement about where all these lines should be drawn. Of course, not every uncomfortable experience is harassment, and not every woman is redefining these experiences as abuse. Jesse Jackson grabbed her thigh during a photo-op. “What happened to me was something that was so casual, I almost didn’t even consider it sexual harassment, even though it was beyond my desire,” wrote the Root’s Danielle Young in a recent piece about the moment the Rev. Actions that once seemed playful or relatively harmless now seem sinister, invisible grease for the wheels of an orchestrated system of humiliation designed to instill self-doubt and fear into women who might have otherwise posed a threat to male control. Now, we must contend with the knowledge that the everyday woman, by virtue of existing in the public sphere, has endured untold violations. Before, we were everyday women dealing with everyday creeps. To people who’ve experienced harassment and abuse, it’s also an alternate history of our own lives. To anyone bearing witness, #MeToo is writing an alternate history of the workplace, the classroom, the corner store, the dance club, the sidewalk, the friend’s party, and the intimate confines of the romantic relationship.